Computer crazy

Why is my computer so uniquely capable of driving me insane?

In general I think it could be said that I am a fairly controlled person. Obviously I have my particular rants, political biases that make me want to scream and, of course, people whose faces I would like to hit repeatedly. Everyone has those. For the most part though, I would describe the parts of me I unleash on the world as a Fairly Nice Person.

So why is it my computer can get me swearing at the top of my voice and throwing things in as little time as it took me to write this sentence? In the past I have actually hurt myself as a result of my embarrassingly strong computer related madness.

My computer is a thing of many quirks. The habit driving me particularly insane right now is a new one. My computer has started playing videos, in particular those in the channel 4 on demand service, in slow motion. Not the sound, just the picture. THERE IS NO REASON FOR THIS. There is nothing worse than trying to watch Homeland and have everything stop at a crucial moment. How am I supposed to figure out who is a terrorist when I can’t even see what’s happening properly?

The other week, while I was making yet another attempt to watch said programme I became so frustrated with the entire endeavour, I hit my desk. Yep. Not a proper angry fist hit either. No, instead I did a kind of whole hand flat slap, reserved for the very, very stupid. Pain reverberated instantly up my whole arm. My eyes filled with tears. As I sat, whisper cursing to myself, I glanced out the window. I had forgotten that, throughout this entire embarrassing episode, there had been a man outside fitting a CCTV camera parallel to my bedroom window (Not (I sincerely hope) to spy on me, but the kids in the playground next to my house. They have set fire to a couple of bins, and national emergency has been announced as a result. There is little less frightening than this group of spotty, metabolically superhuman boys, but some people claim they are now afraid to leave their houses. As another quick segue, the thing that does confuse me about them is how stupid they are. We live in a tiny village. Everyone knows everyone, therefore everyone knows exactly who the “troublemakers” are. Even I know their names and their mothers. Seriously, sometimes old people I am 85% sure I don’t know come up to me in order to inform me of how grown up I am these days. That’s the kind of place this is. What confuses me is why they don’t go to town, where no one would care, let alone know who they were).

The CCTV man laughed at me (Later on my mum told me that apparently the CCTV camera currently outside my house used to be at a prison, because people were throwing drugs over the wall to the prisoners. So there we are). And I abandoned yet another attempt to watch Homeland.